The clearer my mind becomes, the more I realize how much baggage I’ve collected over the years that isn’t me or mine. I know for a fact that each of the statements below (I’ve said and believed them all) came from somewhere else – whether it was media or inherited cultural beliefs.
This process of leading from the inside out – in business or in your life, begins with taking a look at all that you’ve collected (just like your clothes closet), trying beliefs on and letting go of what does not feel like ‘you’ or no longer fits.
For each statement below, I’ve written a few ideas, a few questions and a few thoughts to ponder.
Where did this mind-set come from? Unless you’re Miss Daisy, why are you driven?
A: What’s driving you?
B: Where are you driving to?
C: And why?
“I always push through.”
Pushing is good – when bobsledding or pushing a wheelbarrow. Energetic pushing is exhausting and when you think about it, you are pushing energy out, not drawing it in.
A: How does ‘pushing’ make you feel?
B: Why do you feel like you need to push?
C: Are you pushing out of fear? If so, remember this – False Evidence Appearing Real
“I’m not a quitter.”
Me either. But…I’ve stuck with so many things that I should have let go of or done differently. Perseverance is admiral, when what you are doing is in alignment with your core values, your mission and what matters most – is it?
A: What if you quit? Let this idea roll around for a while – what feelings come up?
B: Are you not quitting because you’ve invested time and energy (more time and energy would be better, hmm)?
C: What if you viewed quitting as courageous?
“I can handle it – I’ve got this.”
Of course you can…and you can also ask for help. I’m speaking to those of you who view yourself as a highly-capable-woman. That’s me and I exhausted myself. There is likely a control issue tucked in here somewhere too. Just sayin’.
A: Why is it that you love to help others but asking for help is so hard?
B: Will someone think less of you if you ask for help?
C: Something to consider – by asking for help, you honor someone’s ability and it makes them feel good.
“You can count on me.”
Absolutely. You’re trustworthy, reliable and you follow through…and you prioritize your well-being. Right?!
A: Have you established healthy boundaries?
B: It’s nice to be the one people turn to and then you can say “no – I’m honored you asked, but no”.
C: Are you the ‘go to girl’ – what unmet need is this fulfilling?
Poking at your thoughts, beliefs and habits – looking at them from different angles, often leads to shifting a belief that is an energy crusher – which then creates space to cultivate your inner energetic spark – the pilot light that leads you (instead of being led).
Happy poking! I’d love to hear what you discovered!